Caged In!

Long weekend. I'm truly living it up, literally every minute in front of various books. This long weekend, it's been myself and a variety of books sitting together. I'm caged in this weekend. There was and arrangement of a party which hung in the air for me to attend but unfortunately i had to turn that offer down.

On the other hand i bothered to read my horoscope earlier last week. I wanted to see if they are really true. Usually when i read horoscopes they have this way of telling you passively about your future, like they don't mention it in straightforward english language, horoscope i tend to find hover around the future because they're scared to get it wrong. A bit like my science teacher i must say. You never get a straightforward answer.
"What is a solvent?" i ask.
"A solvent has the ability to dissolve or saturate particles. Solvents are not solid. When particles dissolve into the solvent, the solvent now consumes the particles henceforth change its properties which forms a new mixture," is the reply.
See in this example where the answer only hovers around the topic. If then i had asked my teacher "So what exactly is a solvent?" i get a reply of "Did you listen to me young lady or are you just ignorant?" This is another example, answers given in question form.
I would have preferred an answer of "A solvent is a liquid which dissolves a substance".
Just thinking now, it's quite ironic how the most different of people can relate. I mean, science speaks in evidence and logic where as astrology talks in predictions without having to describe any evidence.
Anyway i said earlier but drifted away i did read my horoscope and for a matter of fact they described a portion of it in "straightforward english language". The weekly scope mentioned that my hectic life would chill for me by Thursday. In fact that was quite right, i did have a lot of worries during the last week and the week before even if they were just small little reminders that i had to attend to, silly mistakes that i had made and words of which people had said good or bad kept ringing in my head. They were all quite small things to deal with but they all built up at once, it was quite hard to concentrate with words running through my head. This made me build more self consciousness, in this case it's quite a bad thing because before doing anything i would just think and think. Generally i am quite a self conscious person but anymore just slows my life having no time for anything. So to fix this problem i had to stop my routine and just sit in my room and relax my mind. So the week before the last (today is Monday) i took a note to have a break from my external activities and just sat in my room. I remember this was on a Saturday, i sat in my room. I just sat on my bed blankly and if thoughts went scurrying through my head i would not neglect or consume every fact but i would just let them pass through trying not to have opinions. It actually worked. I felt better, i didn't keep track of the time because that day was my opportunity to be blank. I then fixed my mind on lateral games from the internet to distract my mind and get my brain working. This week you can say I'm quite refreshed in time for the caged weekend.

This week has been really dull in weather and my hobbies. I found a relation between myself and Rodger Federer. Yep, that right the legendary tennis player! I guess I'm quite a good tennis player(no boasting). But losing a tennis match isn't my thing and it usually happens once in a blue moon. These last three consecutive weeks have been horror and misery in my tennis life. I've lost all three games in a row. Including a person who I've played and one once before and also beat in a finals match. I lost! That's all i can say. But the weird thing is the scenario didn't recount thoroughly in my mind. It's like i barely cared if i was losing or i had lost through the match and after. The only thing i can diagnose is that I'm distracted. Distracted in life. But distracted by what? That is what i can't find. Anyway as i observe the media. Rodger Federer has been losing his matches aswell these days. I mean who has actually seen Federer lose? What a coincidence. I mean you may think that i lose all the time but in 3 continuous tournaments I've kept a perfect score without a loss and now things change. I don't even find tennis training intriguing anymore. Am i bored of tennis? I can't be. Or maybe it's just a phase I'm going through. This week I have not found a patch of time to even step outside. I barely do any physical activity beside training anyway but still. I usually take my dog out for walks which adds to my physical activity table. That's about it. I really feel like a caged budgie these few weeks.

Talking about the American elections about Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Something occured to me out of the blue. Barack Obama if elected as president will become the first "black" president of America. If this is so then how ironic is it that many presidents in movies are usually "black". I mean they even made a documentary of how Barack Obama is "black". It's funny how i actually watched that. What's the big deal he's just another person. But i one thing that i have learnt is that your background will always be thought about be people who approach you. No matter if they don't categorise there will always be that thought if you think deep.